Monday, January 28, 2008

What if...?

1. What if...we never needed to use the bathroom?

2. What if...we mated with our legs like spiders?

3. What if...we could fly?

4. What if...we had wings and would our looks depend on them?

5. What if...there really was a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?

6. What woke up and everyone was gone?

7. What if...laptops could talk?

8. What if...animals could talk?

9. What realized your entire life took place in virtual reality and it’s not real?

10. What if...the walls could talk?

11. What if...the hokey pokey is really what it’s all about?

12. What if...we had three legs?

13. What if...we all had superpowers?

14. What if...I had to keep going because there is no fifty?

15. What if...everything that is good for you actually tasted good?

16. What if...the weather was perfect all the time?

17. What if...the weather was terrible all the time?

18. What if...we walked everywhere on our hands?

19. What if...people just broke into a musical song and dance for no reason?

20. What if...masturbation really would make you go blind?

21. What if...we had eyes in the back of our heads but not the front?

22. What if...we had two left feet?

23. What if...farts smelled like roses?

24. What if...violets were red and roses were blue?

25. What if...we had tails?

26. What if...sexual reproduction was illegal?

27. What if...flies ate spiders?

28. What if…everyone was colored blind?

29. What if…the U.S. was communist?

30. What if…It was illegal to have emotions?

31. What if…we had telepathy?

32. What if…drugs were legal?

33. What if…everyone worked and lived in virtual reality?

34. What if…bunnies were predators?

35. What if…nudism was widely accepted?

36. What if…men had babies?

37. What if…men had stuff that came out of their nipples?

38. What if…all criminals were put on an island alone?

39. What if…all our rights were extremely limited?

40. What if…robots with artificial intelligence existed with us?

41. What if…everyone was short and rode dogs as transportation?

42. What if…it really did rain cats and dogs?

43. What if…we had an aura around our body to show our mood?

44. What if…we breathed through our ears?

45. What if…we had teleporters to travels places?

46. What if…we had gills to breathe under water?

47. What if…cats and dogs were considered a delicacy in the U.S.

48. What if…tomorrow aliens openly visited us?

49. What if…the earth was so polluted we had to wear suits and gas masks?

50. What if…the teacher just came into class and sat down and didn’t say anything for the whole class?

Monday, January 14, 2008

The Fork

For those that read this page and have no idea what I am talking about, I'm sorry. Not really, sucks to be you but maybe you can figure it out. Now to the fork. I carried the fork around with me wondering what I should do with it. Whenever I walked somewhere I would mess with the prongs and think about poking people with it when I walked by so they would turn around and wonder WTF?
I even thought about coloring the prongs black and making a little face on it so it could be my buddy and maybe even help me with projects. But it wasn't something that I got around to. Instead I just showed my friends and bragged about what my homework was and how fun the class would be. But then my little pet poked, or bit, you could say, me, so like any pet it was put down. Not something that I wanted to do but if it bit other people I could have been in serious doodoo. So let's have a moment of silence and maybe a small prayer for the fork that could've been...Ok now that that's over here are some funny fork sayings.

We only spooned...We didn't fork.
The spork is the bastard child of the spoon and fork.
Want a Fork? (Say it really fast. Trust me)